HASTA BARISTA, BABY.

Alternatively titled: 20 Annoying Things I've Experienced As A Barista.

Until this week, and since March, I'd been working in an unnamed coffee shop on Oxford Street - first part-time, then full-time once I'd finished uni (that £50,000 of debt and the nice diploma sure seem worth it at the moment). Working on potentially the busiest shopping street in the world, I think it's fair to say that I came across quite the range of characters over the past few months.

As I'm no longer working at aforementioned coffee shop, I thought I'd compile a list of twenty irritating situations I consistently found myself in as a barista in order to commemorate my time there. I have no doubt some of them apply to anyone who works in any kind of customer service role as well, so please, enjoy.

1. When you open the dishwasher and it's like you've opened up the gates to Hell itself. Who needs a spa day when you get a relaxing surge of fire shooting into your face multiple times a day, am I right?

2. What is the purpose of a decaf espresso?

3. And on that note..."eXpresso". I just...okay.

4. Did you know that every time you order a frappé, your barista's life expectancy decreases by a full day?

5. When people look at you like you're an alien when you ask "which coffee?" after they say they want "a coffee".

6. "I want something really milky; what has more milk, a latte or a cappuccino?" "A latte, technically." "Okay, I'll have a cappuccino."

7. When you put an iced drink on the counter and someone comes to the bar and says "is this my cappuccino?" Sure, Jan.

8. Those barista hands though. I didn't know I was a REPTILE.

9. "I'll have a cappuccino with no foam." "So, a latte?" "No, a cappuccino with no foam."

10. When people irritatedly approach you, demanding you unlock the toilet door, and you have to carefully tell them that if it's locked it's probably because there's someone inside the toilet, y'know, emptying their bladder and whatnot.

11. Finding syrup all over your skin and clothes when you get home. 

12. When people talk on their phone as they order and barely acknowledge you. :-----)

13. Spilling an americano over your hand in front of customers and pretending everything is fine.

14. When people ask for a specific number of ice cubes in their drink.

15. When customers just have no idea what they've ordered and then expect you to have made the drink in four seconds flat.

16. "Ugh, this is so expensive." "Sorry." "It's so much cheaper at XYZ." "Sure." "At XYZ, I can get ABC for £2!" "Gosh." 

17. When the whipped cream canister explodes everywhere.

18. "Soya cappuccino!" "Is this the soya cappuccino?" "...Yes."

19. When multiple customers intently watch you make drinks and the pressure of doing it right increases tenfold. 

20. The burns all over your hands. They never end.

#justbaristathings.

There we go, that's my list of fun situations I dealt with on a day-to-day basis as a barista. My new job is a similar sort of thing so to be honest, these experiences probably will not stop at the doors of my old coffee shop. I'm sure I'll be blessed with more over the coming months.

These are obviously all in jest, though I'm sure someone somewhere is going to get offended ("why complain about making frappés when it's your JOB and it's on the MENU" - okay Gary, just letting you know that blended drinks are annoying to make, calm down), and I definitely mean no ill towards my coffee shop or co-workers or other baristas of the world. If you are a barista or other hospitality/retail worker let me know if any of these are #relatable, or if you have anything to add to the list - I'd love to hear them and share your pain.

See you next time!

Georgia